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Lorde’s “Tennis Court” Song is about the French Revolution

July 17th, 2014 by pladd

It’s probably a coincidence that this song came on the radio while I was listening on my way to the library on Bastille Day. OR WAS IT. I am 99% sure that this song is all about the French Revolution, most obviously the tennis court oath:

Let’s go down to the tennis court and talk it out

I mean, really, what ELSE could that lyric be referring to? In 1789, Louis XVI was broke, in no small part because of France’s involvement with the American War for Independence, so he called the Estates General, an advisory body made up of nobles, clergy, and commoners. The Estates General was a purely advisory body, and traditionally each of the groups had met and advised the king separately, but the 3rd Estate, the Commons (i.e. 99% of France), wasn’t taking that shit anymore. In protest, they refused to do any work until the others agreed to meet all together. The stalemate went on for weeks, until one day the Third Estate found their traditional meeting room locked. Coincidence… OR ROYAL PLOT? They filed on down to a tennis court and took an oath to not leave until they’d given France a Constitution. A little act of Englightenment-style rebellion that basically led to this:

Because I’m doin’ this for the thrill of it, killin’ it

And then later:

Getting caught’s half of the trip though, isn’t it?
I fall apart with all my heart

Think about it.

Baby, be the class clown

I’ll be the beauty queen in tears

Everything’s cool when we’re all in line for the throne

But I know it’s not forever

Open your eyes, comrades!

Tagged: french revolution, history

Posted in Uncategorized |

People You Should Know About: Lucy Stone

September 5th, 2013 by pladd

While reading the wikipedia article on married names for my last blog post, I came across a reference to the “Lucy Stone League,” which was founded in 1921 and was all about campaigning for a woman’s right to keep and legally use her name after marriage. This led me to read up more on Lucy Stone, one of the first women to do so.

And she was awesome!

Her expression says, “Yeah, I’m into equality, what’s it to you?”

Lucy Stone was born in 1818 and from a young age vowed support herself and not marry, because she saw how being dependent on some dude was not the greatest for her mom, her aunt (whose husband abandoned her), and other women in her community. To this end, she struggled to pay her way through college at Oberlin through teaching, although for most of that time she was paid a “woman’s salary,” significantly less than what her male colleagues made. She started making her living as an abolitionist and women’s rights orator, and that’s how she met Henry Blackwell.

Proof that American values are in decline, at least in the facial hair department

Henry asked her to marry him, and she was all, “Listen, guy, I like you, but not enough to give up my property, rights, and identity to you, you know?” Valid point, girlfriend. But THEN Henry was like, “No, Lucy, even though our entire society has told me my entire life that I am superior to you in every way I don’t buy it. We should be equal partners, and I care enough about you as a person to make that happen.” I’m paraphrasing obviously but ~swoon~.

You can be my valentine anytime, Henry Blackwell!

Seriously, that is like the most romantic thing ever. Henry thought that marriage should be a partnership that let each spouse succeed in ways they couldn’t alone–to prove it he organized her lecture tour in 1853. When Lucy finally agreed to marry him, they also agreed to split all expenses, and keep their own separate property if they split up. Blackwell also agreed that, since women are the ones most burdened by “the results of intercourse,” it would be up to her “when, where, and how often she became a mother.” HOLY CRAP THIS WAS 1854 YOU GUYS!!!

Anyway, they got married, Lucy Stone kept her name–or tried to. Even though there was no specific law saying she had to take her husband’s name, she often had trouble paying taxes, buying property, and doing other public-document-type things because the clerks would insist that she had to use her “real” name.

I guess the tattoo idea hadn’t occurred to her. A simpler time

Also once she refused to pay her property tax because it was 1858 and women couldn’t vote. She mailed it back to the county clerk with a letter explaining that it violated America’s founding principles.

That whole “No Taxation Without Representation” thing only applies to MEN, silly. And people who live outside DC.

Tagged: feminism, history, lucy stone, romance

Posted in Uncategorized |

North Dakota: The Truth Revealed

May 24th, 2011 by pladd

North Dakota is maybe the least loved US state. You know it’s bad when even South Dakota is making fun of you. What’s the deal? Is it, as Canada tries to console you, that they’re all just jealous? That Massachusetts really just wants to ask you to the 8th grade dance and that’s why he’s always saying you’re a fat, worthless patch of nothing? Anyway, come on, who’s NOT fat compared to Massachusetts? Only prissy bitches like Rhode Island, that’s who. Really, North Dakota, I think if people would just take the time to get to know you, they’d realize you’re really a beautiful state with a great personality.

And, okay, maybe your interminable winters are known for the triple threat of frostbite, Seasonal Affective Disorder, and vampires, but we’re all cranky once in awhile, and that shouldn’t stop people from enjoying you in the balmy (if brief) summer months. Like I did last week! I’ve written before about North Dakota Time Travel and North Dakota animals, but this time I decided to concentrate on debunking some of the myths about North Dakota. Unfortunately, Steven wanted his camera for his sister’s graduation or some other thing that is CLEARLY less important than my North Dakota research. Don’t worry, I’ll try to recreate everything for you using the power of my words. And maybe MSPaint.

1. North Dakota Doesn’t Exist

This is something you used to hear a lot in the pre-Internet days, especially if you had Ms. Szabo for 6th grade social studies at Seminole Middle School. Luckily Google Maps has pretty much squashed rumors that there’s just a big empty hole between Minnesota and Montana.

Unless you think Google is ALSO in on the conspiracy

Of course, the currently more popular corollary to this theory is:

2. Well, have you ever MET anyone from North Dakota?

YES. Lots of them. But I realize not everyone can say that. I mean, unless you’ve met my mom too. I decided not to take a picture of everyone I met on this trip to prove this one, even though I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t have minded. Everyone in North Dakota is polite, and usually pretty nice to strangers, maybe from having to band together as a team to survive every winter. Plus, they react with plucky enthusiasm to outsiders, possibly after having to argue their own existence so often. Anyway, I did some research for you on The North Dakota State Data Center and the US Census site to get you some numbers. The population of Bismarck, the state capital I was visiting is about 61,000 as of the 2010 census.

More about why Bismarck is awesome later. The total population of North Dakota is about 672,600:

I included my current state of residence for comparison

Since the total population of the US as of the 2010 census was 308,745,538, about 1 in every 500 people you meet is from North Dakota. Plus, TWO America’s Next Top Model winners have been from North Dakota. I’m not trying to say that everyone from North Dakota is model-hot, just most of them.

3.There’s nothing in North Dakota

Wikipedia does claim that North Dakota is the least visited state. True, it’s not really on the way to anywhere and doesn’t really have any “major tourist attractions”. For me, the giant slide near the Bismarck zoo will always be a “tourist attraction” but there are more legit things to visit. For instance, Theodore Roosevelt National Park! As you know, the only thing TR loved more than shooting things was photographing himself doing it, and North Dakota was an awesome place to do that! You too can see some of the animals that TR loved (and loved to kill) in the National Park named after him!

Like meerkats, but without the singing

Nearby Medora claims to be “North Dakota’s #1 Vacation” and features more old-timey fun with a bunch of cowboys and a ridiculously cheesy musical that’s been shown there since at least 1965.

The International Peace Garden on the border between the US and Canada is also kind of a big deal.

Admit it, you didn't think flowers could grow in North Dakota

This huge garden is the only thing that’s kept the US and Canada from going to war since 1932. Plus, there’s a floral clock! Good job, US Civilian Conservation Corps.

4. Nothing has ever happened in North Dakota

Oh, man, are you wrong! The best thing about Bismarck is that everything is named after either Lewis and Clark, Sakakawea/Sacagawea, or General Custer, three awesome historical figures.

What a great line up of North Dakota awesomeness! I know everyone’s always hating on Custer, but, as North Dakota likes to advertise, he was in perfect health until he left. Plus, both he and Sacagawea were in Night at the Museum 2!

TRUE NORTH DAKOTA HISTORY, YOU GUYS

Lightning Bonus Round

North Dakota’s State Beverage is Milk!
North Dakota has a hymn and a creed!
I bought a North Dakota coloring book that allowed me to do this on the plane:

Tagged: history, North Dakota, research

Posted in lists |

(Possibly Untrue) Things I’ve Taught the Girl I Tutor

March 11th, 2011 by pladd

Once a week I spend three hours talking about science and American history with a fifth grade girl who moved here about a year ago from Korea. Her English is awesome, but because she didn’t grow up celebrating the 4th of July or dressing up like historically inaccurate pilgrims her take on US history is often a little bit different. Of course, my own idiosyncrasies are only warping her further.

1. Mangroves are the MOST important part of nature

That's right, more important than ducks

Unless you grew up in Florida or some other, very specific coastal regions, you probably don’t know what a mangrove is, which is shocking because I’m pretty sure they were all we studied in 4th grade. That, and how to write a five paragraph essay. Usually about saving the mangroves. They are the only tree that grows in salt water and their elaborate root systems are a great place for tiny fish to hide from bigger fish and for things to lay eggs. People wanting more beach real estate has threatened their existence in a lot of areas, including the part of Florida where I grew up, which might explain why 4th grade was obsessed with brainwashing us into saving them.

Seriously, I knew everything about mangroves in fourth grade. We read about all the animals that depend on them, we learned how to identify the different kinds and their parts, we took field trips just to look at them. “Mangroves,” fourth grade taught me, “are an ESSENTIAL part of life.”

Then I moved away from Florida, and have remained unaffected by mangroves ever since. But when North Carolina schools started studying ecosystems and biomes, I brought in all these library books to tutoring about mangroves because, thanks to fourth grade, THEY ARE THE ONLY ECOSYSTEM I KNOW.

Yeah, I said it, Temperate Deciduous Forest. What are gonna do about it?

2. Teddy Roosevelt: World’s Greatest Human
Teddy Roosevelt is not only my favorite president (sorry, James K. Polk, it’s true), but also the person from history I would most like to meet. In fact, the only reason I’m doing the librarian thing is because my actual dream, solving time traveling mysteries with TR, proved totally unfeasible.

TR would be like a more badass version of Inspector Gadget, I would be Penny, and Dr. Claw would be played by a bionic Thomas Edison. Brain would be replaced by an actual floating brain.

I think it’s because, unlike all modern politicians ever, he didn’t feel the need to conceal his entire personality behind a cardboard cutout designed to be boring enough to offend no one. Teddy Roosevelt knew what he liked, and it was exploring the wilderness, digging canals, and big game hunting. And if you didn’t like it, tough, because he was going to do it anyway. Also, this one time he got shot during one of his speeches and just kept going. This may be the only fact the girl I tutor will remember about US history, which is fine since it’s THE BEST ONE.
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Tagged: florida, history, science, time travel, tutoring

Posted in lists |