March, 2015 | The Plaid Pladd Blog

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2015 Goal Update: March

March 31st, 2015 by pladd

Since we’re about a quarter of the way through 2015, I thought it was time to give you an update on my 2015 goals! I’m off to a good start!

1.Read 1 book each month I think I’ll disagree with: 25%

So far I’ve been doing this one in conjunction with Goal 7:

January: The New Lifetime Reading Plan by Clifton Fadiman and John S. Major

I was so sure this one would be only full of dead white guy writers, but there were actually a ton of international works. I put a bunch of things on my to-read list. A pleasant surprise!

February: Don’t Be That Girl by Travis Stork

The cover is particularly insulting

A guide written by a former Bachelor contestant about how to stop being bad stereotypes of women and how to start being a stereotype of women that Travis Stork approves of. The best is the chapter where he tells you you’re too good at your job and it’s intimidating to potential dates.

March: The Frazzled Female by Cindi Wood

This book had some good points about taking time to relax and practice mindfulness and self-care. But in general it was very repetitive and I didn’t care for the writing style. Or being called a female.

2. Finish I Detonate Around Him: 75%

This is my tumblr that critiques 50 Shades of Grey. I’m about 80% done with the last book!! And then I have my traditional wrap up posts where I make graphs like a huge nerd.

Pictured: Something a huge nerd would do

It’s been 3 years, so I’m looking forward to finally being done.

3. Visit every restaurant on my list of restaurants to visit: 58%

This is kind of cheating because the list included things that I already had visited before the start of this year. But after last year’s abject failure, I needed something to give me an edge! So far probably the coolest thing we’ve tried is Escazu chocolates, where you can get historical hot chocolates, made from recipes as far back as the 1500s!

We all know Cortes could hot chocolate like a boss

4. Review at least 1 thing online a month: 25%

So far I have only reviewed places I really like (La Farm, Carolina Popcorn Shoppe, Goji Bistro) to make it easier. Eventually I promise to give something less than 5 stars, but I have to work up the nerve.

5. Plaid Pladd Blog: One guest blog post per month: 25%

So far we have had three great guest blogs!!!! James Fox gave us a thorough look at his studies into bad anime, Rob wrote a nice excerpt from his ongoing examination into America’s Next Top Model, and Mom Ladd wrote about the perils and rewards of being Mom Ladd.

6. Knit a sweater: 60%

This is just an estimate, but I’ve finished the front, back, and most of one sleeve. It looks good so far!!

7. Get hella into a different Dewey Decimal Class each month: 25%

So far, the 100s have been my favorite!

Total: 42%

Pretty good for March!

Previously: 2015 goals

Tagged: 2015 goals, reviews

Posted in 2015 Goals |

And the New Day was a Great Big Fish: My Top 10 Discworld Novels

March 13th, 2015 by pladd

I was more upset than seems natural that the world lost one of its greatest writers, and, more importantly, a kind and awesome person when Sir Terry Pratchett died yesterday. His books are, quite simply, magic. They mean so much to me that I’ve rewritten this post at least twelve times because it never seems to be enough. I can’t explain it well enough to do them justice, especially if you’ve never read any.

The Discworld floats through space, supported by four gigantic elephants who are themselves standing on a giant turtle. A Star Turtle. It seems strange at first, but after you’re one or two books in, it seems completely natural.

The Discworld

Discworld books always get shelved in fantasy, because some of the characters are subpar wizards and there are swamp dragons and time travel and trolls. But it’s not some High Fantasy bullshit where you need a giant appendix with a glossary of elvish terms and characters. The Discworld is more about our world than anything. It’s about war and death and the pain of growing up and growing old, the magic in everyday things and the power of humans and what they can do together–for good or for evil.

Also, it’s hilarious.

I mean, if you couldn’t tell from the giant world turtle. My favorite books are hilarious but also meaningful. The other great thing about Discworld is that it really is an entire world. There are over 40 books, but most of them don’t go in any particular order. There are a few general storylines, but also many one-off novels, and characters from different books appear as minor characters in others. That in itself is a feature I love, like unexpectedly bumping into an old friend. I really think this means that there is a Discworld book for everyone. I love all of them, but at certain times in my life I’ve been more drawn to the Rincewind stories, for instance, whereas now (as you’ll see from my list) anything featuring Vimes usually gets top billing. It was hard to decide on a Top 10, and I feel like I will change my mind about some of the ordering even tomorrow, but for now:

10. Men at Arms

I love Vimes novels because I love: 1) a good mystery, 2) a scruffy, world-weary underdog, and 3) the underlying themes of inclusion and justice. Vimes works for the Ankh-Morpork City Watch, which, at least at the beginning, gets about as much respect as those flunky guards who always get killed by the hero on the way in to save the princess in a trope-filled fantasy novel. Still, I would classify these books as police procedurals, with werewolves. In this one, Vimes has to catch a serial killer on the loose in Ankh-Morpork with a strange new weapon that does untold damage. He also has to deal with new species integration in the Watch, when he’s forced to hire a dwarf, a troll, and a werewolf.

The werewolf is Sergeant Angua and I LOVE HER

I really like watching Vimes grow as a person throughout the books about him, but still retain that hard-bitten core of Vimesishness. This book uses the anti-dwarf/troll/werewolf attitudes espoused by Vimes, other Watch members, and the populace at large to parody real issues of racism and sexism, and Pratchett’s portrayal is spot fucking on.

9.The Fifth Elephant

This is another, later City Watch novel, where Vimes is sent as a diplomatic envoy from Ankh-Morpork to Uberwald for the crowning of a new Low King of the dwarfs. Of course, since it’s a Vimes novel, there’s a mystery to solve–namely, the theft of a sacred dwarf artifact. And the theft of a model of it from an Ankh-Morpork museum. And the murder of a condom maker. Related? Maybe! This book builds on previous worldbuilding and gives us an insight into “traditional” dwarf, werewolf, and vampire society. Ankh-Morpork and all its problems are downright cosmopolitan by comparison. Case in point: Corporal Cheery Littlebottom, one of the first openly female dwarfs.

Note the riveted skirt and earrings. Get it, girl

Pratchett’s depiction of traditional dwarf society, with all the attendant legends and mythology of a people who have lived their lives underground, in near-darkness, is breathtaking. The way he plays with traditional tropes is hilarious (the main vampire character, a Countess, knits her own cardigans). This book is as much a political thriller as it is a mystery, and Vimes is the best forever.
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Tagged: Book Reviews, books, discworld, lists, terry pratchett

Posted in Book Reviews, lists |

Disney Princesses: Callously Judged

March 9th, 2015 by pladd

I decided to rank the Disney princesses, because that’s the kind of thing I do. I was surprised by the results. When asked who my favorite Disney princess is, I’m most likely to say “Merida” or “Mulan”, I guess because growing up reading Tamora Pierce makes me love anything with lady warriors. Ultimately, when deciding on the order of this list, though, I went by who I would most like to hang out with. And I love hanging out with awesome badasses, but I guess there are some other things I value more. I also used the official list of Disney princesses so characters like Megara don’t appear (sadly).

11. Snow White

Ugh, I even hate her face

Snow White is the worst Disney princess. Don’t even try to fight me on this, because it’s definitely true. Her costume is weird, her voice is annoying, and she spends a good chunk of her story either crying or asleep. Plus, she is fourteen, which makes her entire story really creepy.

10. Aurora

Subject of the original “What color is this dress?” debate

Aurora is also pretty boring and annoying. She hardly has any lines in her own movie, and, again, spends a lot of time asleep. Plus, girl gets way too friendly with random dudes she meets in the woods. Still, she’s slightly better than Snow White because she’s mostly just a cardboard cutout of a character instead of actively annoying.

9. Cinderella

But minus points for that hair because what

Finally a princess with a little personality! Unlike Snow White and Aurora, I feel like I know more about Cinderella as a person, even if it’s a person I’m not that jazzed about hanging out with. She’s not afraid of hard work, and her initial life experiences will probably make her a compassionate ruler who doesn’t take her wealth for granted. I wish she had a little more spirit instead of just doing whatever her Evil Stepmother or her Fairy Godmother says, though.

8. Rapunzel

And Obligatory Disney Animal Sidekick, of course

I like Rapunzel’s optimism and her curiosity. She would be fun to hang out with for an afternoon, but I think her relentless cheeriness would eventually wear me down. Like, sometimes I just want to make fun of how bad something is (like Snow White). And you can try to make me feel guilty about that, but I won’t. Plus, why do you have a pet lizard.

7. Ariel

I am REALLY surprised to see Ariel so far down on this list

When I was little, Ariel was definitely my bff. She was curious and rebellious and headstrong. But, while I still like her, adult-me thinks she is kind of dumb. Like, OKAY, you think forks are combs even though the mermaid-world must be eating their food with something. But why doesn’t she step up her attempts at communication? Girl signed a contract so she’s clearly literate. Write Prince Eric a note! Draw him a picture! Don’t just wave your hands awkwardly and then give up. I need a little more ingenuity in my Disney Princess Fave.

6. Jasmine

Plus, those pants look hella comfortable

Jasmine is the only character in her movie with any sense at all. NO, DAD, I am not just going to marry some random losers because you think 15 is too old to be an old maid, EW. And hey, this Jafar guy is CLEARLY EVIL, let’s stop listening to him. I like that she calls Aladdin on his shit for lying to her. Plus, a pet tiger is metal as hell. Jasmine is solid. The only reason she’s not higher is because she’s clearly led a really sheltered life so far, so other princesses beat her out on the fun-to-hang-with scale (a very scientific measurement).

5. Pocahontas

Not taking into account historical accuracy because wow

Pocahontas knows what’s up. She has clear goals (which aren’t just “get a dude”) and she shows equal measures of compassion and backbone. She argues with John Smith when he’s patronizing, but also doesn’t think that straight up killing the invaders is necessarily the answer. Plus, she can climb trees, dive off cliffs, and paint with all the colors of the wind, so you know we would have a good time hiking and meeting bear cubs and whatnot. The only downside is that she has some freaky supernatural powers. Not only is her grandmother a tree, but she learns English instantaneously by “listening to her heart”. What else is her heart telling her? All my secrets? That I haven’t washed my hair in three days? You can see why hanging with her would be a risk.

4. Belle

Belle’s fashion game is on point

Belle loves to read! Clearly we would have a lot to talk about! She wants more adventures and doesn’t put up with gross jerks. We would clearly be good friends, although maybe not BEST friends, because her idea of adventure is “taming” a dude and getting married. You can’t change him, girlfriend, and my adventures generally involve at least a scavenger hunt so… pass.

3. Merida

Give me that hair.

I love Merida’s attitude and her adventurous spirit. She’s in a similar situation to Jasmine, but her solution is not just to whine about it, but to DO SOMETHING to assert her autonomy. I also like how she grows as a person so much during her story and begins to appreciate both of her parents and what they’re trying to do for her. Plus, her style is what I want forever.

2. Mulan

Your awkwardness speaks to me

Mulan is so amazing!!!!!!!! I have no complaints about her at all. If anything, I’m worried that I’m not awesome enough to hang with her. She doesn’t fit in to the strict gender roles of her society and feels awkward dressed up fancy wearing make up (I HEAR YOU, GIRL). She takes drastic measures to save her father and works hard to become a warrior!!! Then she SAVES CHINA!!! Also, she gets a hot dude in the end, but I like how that’s never her top priority. Girl’s gotta live her life–AWESOMELY–and you can come along if you want to, Li Shang, if you can keep up.

1. Tiana

Reason number one: girl can cook

Tiana is the best. Tiana is who I most want to hang out with. Tiana wins everything. She decided her dream was to open a restaurant so she worked as hard as humanly possible to save up the money, working against racism and sexism to finally achieve her dreams. She doesn’t take any of Prince Naveen’s shit, but she still helps him even when he’s acting like a spoiled baby. Plus, at the end, even though she finds her OTL, she still achieves her dream of opening a restaurant!! Tiana is an awesome role model, and would make a great friend. And that is why she is my top pick for best Disney Princess. She has a lot in common with Mulan, but she achieves her success by working within the system instead of radically undermining it. Both are legit, but I feel like one is less scary for people like me to accomplish. Plus, Tiana has beignets.

Tagged: disney, lists

Posted in lists |

Mom Ladd on Being Mom Ladd

March 7th, 2015 by momladd

This month’s guest post is written by MY MOM!!!!!!!! I’m pretty excited she agreed to do one. As you already know how awesome she is! Enjoy!-PLADD

When Patricia first mentioned that she was going to have guest bloggers this year, my immediate reaction was: “AWESOME! I want to do it! This will be great, I can do this.” Then reality set in and I began thinking, “Oh my gosh, it involves creativity and writing ability and her blog is so great month after month. I CANNOT do it, but luckily Trish has many talented friends (you know who you are), so it will be ok, I will not have to participate.”

As a teacher, I often find myself in similar situations when I don’t think before I agree to do something I will later regret. The problem is too many times I have gone ahead with the idea anyway without thinking about the reality. One such time involved me participating in a Faculty vs. High School Boys Basketball game at Seminole High School a few years back. Sure, I played basketball in high school. “I can do this,” I thought. “We can kick their butts in a game!” However, the reality of the situation was: the boys were faster, taller, and stronger. AND my basketball skills had diminished due to the years that had passed since I had gone to high school and the fact that I hadn’t PLAYED in a basketball game for years.

This is how I thought I would look

Needless to say, even though my jersey had the #1 on it, I was not. It was a mess and will be remembered only because I pulled a kid’s shorts down while going after the basketball and we both ended up tumbling to the ground. Luckily, he was wearing 3 layers of shorts, so no inappropriate personal parts were displayed, but it was not a good scene. I know you want a picture here, but, sorry, the crowd was too stunned to snap a shot.

Most other times I have made rash decisions that I regretted later involved wearing costumes or losing bets I was stupid enough to make with students. Something they never mentioned in teacher training: don’t make bets with students. They probably thought it goes without saying. Many of these pictures ended up in yearbooks, so I will be remembered not as a pretty good math teacher, but as the “crazy ” one. The following is evidence. You can draw your own conclusions.

Geometry Day!

After a hard day of teaching. I took a bite out of a few?

What was I thinking?

Probably the very worst decision of all was allowing some students to “spike” my hair. I told them it couldn’t be done, but actually with the right amount of Elmer’s glue and rubber bands… anything is possible. There’s some words of wisdom for you to live by.

The picture I want to be remembered by

So now that I have established that I shouldn’t make rash decisions, and I should definitely not take on things I’m not really qualified to do, I’ll share with you the following phone conversation.

Tricia: Mom, I am going to ask you a favor, and you are going to say no. But after you have a chance to think about it, you are going to say yes.

Me: (speechless) …OK, what is the favor?

Tricia: I want you to be a guest writer on my blog.

Me: (Silence)…(Speechless)…(terror)…

Tricia: Maybe you can write about teaching? Or write about a recipe you like? Or maybe about Pi Day?

You all know, Tricia can be quite convincing when she wants to be, and I would have been afraid to turn her down. She does own several swords, and she is not afraid to use them.

The Aragorn is all mine though

I knew the reason Tricia mentioned teaching, cooking, and Pi Day. These are areas that I am quite passionate about. I got to thinking about it, and realized the only topic this blog entry should be, because it is my greatest passion and the area of my life that I have taken the most time with and I am most proud of: being Patricia and Thomas’s Mom. Also, I am figuring that most of Tricia’s blog readers are not yet parents, and also may become parents sometime in the future. So, here goes.

Thoughts on Being Mom Ladd

1. Children are cute.

They need to be cute because they take an insane amount of energy if you are going to do it right. Plan on 20 hour days, especially at first. I figure it is God’s way of helping you forget your life before children.

Evidence they are so cute

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Tagged: Mom Ladd

Posted in Guest Posts |